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How to Tell College Coaches You’re Not Interested

Contributor Rick Paine is an expert on the college recruiting process. He is also the Director of Swimming at American College Connection (ACC).

ACC is a SwimSwam Partner. 

Having to tell college coaches that you are not interested in their program and school is a nice problem to have, but it is a problem.

For a teenager, having to tell respected adults who have shown great interest in you that their program is not for you is cause for much consternation. This can be one of the most distasteful parts of recruiting for the recruit and the college coach.

  • Keep all of your options open, but if you are absolutely sure that you are not interested in a school, let the coach know right away.
  • Handle it with class. Let them know that you are honored that they want you to swim for them.
  • If a coach has spoken with you on the phone, they deserve a phone call. If you have been communicating with a coach via email, then you can email them.
  • Be sincere and show respect for the coach and program.
  • Keep it short.
  • Coaches are rejected by recruits every year; most will appreciate your honesty.
  • Most coaches will be glad that you informed them of your lack of interest so that they don’t waste their time.
  • Some coaches will ask why you are not interested. Give them sincere and honest answers.
  • Don’t make your parents do your “dirty work”. You will lose the coach’s respect if you try to pass the buck.

Here is an example of how to tactfully let a college coach know you are not interested. If you do it right, the rejected coach will have even more respect for you and you will have gained another fan and supporter.

Dear Coach _______,

I am honored that you think I could compete for your team. I have completed the difficult task of narrowing down my list of schools. Because I have such great respect for you and your program, I feel I must inform you now that I am looking elsewhere to go to school and compete. Thanks for your sincere interest. I wish you and your team much success and I hope we can remain friends.

Don’t copy this word for word. Put it into your own words and send it to coaches as soon as you are sure you are not interested.

This is not fun, but suck it up and get it done. Pat yourself on the back…it is a nice problem to have.

American College Connection is known and trusted by college coaches.

“American College Connection has been the best recruiting tool that I have experienced over the last 40 years,” former Princeton coach C. Rob Orr said. “Probably the best part of it is the follow up of honest appraisal given by Rick Paine on each candidate. His assessment has always be spot on each time I have asked his opinion on specific candidates. Using American College Connection has positively helped our program over the years.”

ACC Recruiting is a SwimSwam ad partner  Go here and learn more about ACC and their team of college swimming experts. 

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Anonymous
5 years ago

The coaches at the school a kid decided to attend is also a great resource. Ask them how they would prefer to hear it.

The michael phelps caterpillar
5 years ago

This is a subject very near and dear to me. I had to say, “NO!” to more than 75 college coaches. I was too fast for college, went straight to the draft!

HOO Fan
Reply to  The michael phelps caterpillar
5 years ago

Oh please

The michael phelps caterpillar
Reply to  HOO Fan
5 years ago

Hoo Fan, do you know who you are talking to? I am a swimming legend (for my summer swim team) and have won 7 county titles. Speak to me with more respect.

Awsi Dooger
5 years ago

Sounds presidential

Swimfan
5 years ago

Perhaps a follow up to this can be “How to respectfully respond to an athlete who tells you they’re not interested.” We were very hands off our swimmer’s recruiting process. He knew exactly where he wanted to go and where he didn’t want to go. But after very nicely telling coaches he wasn’t interested, he did not always get respectful responses. One coach in particular would not accept the fact that our son didn’t want to visit this program. It was a high profile coach and he was obviously insulted. No answer was good enough. This process isn’t easy… especially for a 16 or 17 year old to have to tell an adult… who may be very successful in their… Read more »

PAC SWIM FAN
Reply to  Swimfan
5 years ago

I would think this kind of a response from a Coach is a good teachable moment in that it totally reinforces your son’s original decision to say no thank you.

SwimGeek
Reply to  PAC SWIM FAN
5 years ago

Exactly.

Daboss
Reply to  Swimfan
5 years ago

We need to hear the coaches side of the story!

PsychoDad
Reply to  Swimfan
5 years ago

Fortunatelly, coaches like that are rare. Most of them will appreciate a rejection letter so they do not waste time on you and even suggest “you will be a great asset whatever team you join.” Maybe because not many prospects send such letters/e-mails?

Ernie and Bert
Reply to  Swimfan
5 years ago

Sounds like a particular Hoosier head coach. He has a history of this with a lot of kids.

DrSwimPhil
5 years ago

Most importantly: just say it. Much better than ignoring the coach (or vice-versa, for the coaches).

Daboss
5 years ago

Amazing advice which every student-athlete MUST read!!!!

About Braden Keith

Braden Keith

Braden Keith is the Editor-in-Chief and a co-founder/co-owner of SwimSwam.com. He first got his feet wet by building The Swimmers' Circle beginning in January 2010, and now comes to SwimSwam to use that experience and help build a new leader in the sport of swimming. Aside from his life on the InterWet, …

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