Adam Peaty has never been one to shy away from expressing his feelings outwardly.
The three-time Olympic champion has long been viewed as a brash, confident athlete who isn’t afraid to let everyone know how good he is—a distinction he’s certainly earned as one of the most dominant figures in swimming over the last eight years.
However, since reaching the pinnacle of the sport, Peaty has spoken openly in a different tone, shedding light on the mental battles he’s gone through both on his path to the top and even more so now that he’s achieved everything he set out to do.
In May 2020, Peaty spoke about the “post-Olympic blues” he had felt after Rio 2016, including “drinking and partying too much,” and some of that has followed him in recent years.
The 28-year-old recently gave an exclusive interview to The Times from Spain, where he’s situated for a training camp under coach Ben Titley to hit the reset button both physically and mentally.
“It’s been an incredibly lonely journey,” Peaty told The Times.
“The devil on my shoulder (says), ‘You’re missing out on life, you’re not good enough, you need a drink, you can’t have what you want, you can’t be happy.’ ”
Last month, Peaty withdrew from the recently-concluded British Swimming Championships, Great Britain’s selection meet for the 2023 World Championships, citing mental health reasons.
The drinking issues that he touched on a few years ago have become more prevalent in his life.
The Times says Peaty mentioned that drinking is “his weakness” and that the demons he deals with sometimes point him in the direction of alcohol.
“Honestly, I’ve been on a self-destructive spiral, which I don’t mind saying because I’m human,” Peaty said, according to The Times. “By saying it, I can start to find the answers.”
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The mental challenges Peaty struggles with stem from where he finds himself in the sport—the drive to succeed was diminishing after he already reached the top.
“‘Mental health’ has become a very loose term,” he said. “I meant that I got to a point in my career where I didn’t feel like myself, I didn’t feel happy swimming, I didn’t feel happy racing, my biggest love in the sport.
“I’ve had my hand hovering over a self-destruct button because if I don’t get the result that I want, I self-destruct.
“Sometimes that can be good because I use that as a long-term motivation. It’s why the rise (to being world #1) was so quick at first . . . frankly, it pisses me off to lose.”
Peaty’s internal struggles have only been compounded by external things, such as the lackluster 2022 he had in the pool and his split with Eiri Munro, the mother of his two-year-old son, George. Peaty went on to speak about the massive amount of time he invests in the sport, trying to get better by a couple of one-hundredths of a second.
On days when he’s not feeling good, Peaty has had difficulty battling through given that he’s already achieved so much success in the pool.
“The difference between now and 2015 is that you had a lot more energy and you had a lot more to prove. The difficult thing now is that when I talk back to the voice that says, ‘You’re not feeling good today,’ I’m like, ‘Yeah, I don’t feel good today and I’ve done everything in this sport I’ve ever wanted to do, so why am I still fighting?’ That’s the reason I took the break.”
He also linked the voice in his head to his drinking.
“I’m trying to quieten that voice, which is alcohol,” he said. “I like a glass of wine or a beer but when I haven’t got a stimulus, nothing to focus on, I really struggle with the noise.”
Despite all of the challenges he’s dealing with, Peaty’s eyes remain on the ultimate goal of winning a third straight Olympic gold medal in the men’s 100 breaststroke next summer in Paris.
If he were to do so, he would join Michael Phelps, an athlete who had similar experiences dealing with mental health amidst his time at the top of the sport, as only the second male swimmer to win the same event at three straight Olympics.
“I think I can do that, otherwise I wouldn’t be here, but it’s going to take a very different journey to get down to that,” he said.
Peaty said he never felt quite right when he returned from a foot injury (that forced him out of the 2022 World Championships) to compete at the Commonwealth Games, shockingly missing the podium in the 100 breast.
“You work for months and months on getting the feel and flow of breaststroke right,” he says. “It’s a fine line and the foot just didn’t feel right. It was too soon.”
Peaty says he’s frequently felt as though all of his past success will disappear should he falter in his next performance, something he’s finally able to reframe in his mind.
“That’s something I’ve come to terms with only recently,” he said. “I was like, ‘Hold on a minute, I’ve achieved all this,’ but I’m always thinking I’m going to lose it if I don’t win my next one.
“It’s like you’re playing all in on red. I’ve realized that no one can take any of it away from me. And yes, I may have immortality,” he said referencing his world record of 56.88 in the men’s 100 breast, a goal he dubbed “Project Immortal” when first setting out to break 57 seconds.
“No one knows how fast ‘special’ is going to get but my time is going to be up there for a long time to come.”
Peaty has taken to writing journal entries and taking 15-minute “time to think” walks during his training stint in Spain, helping him reset mentally.
Peaty has also been able to use his platform to help promote the next generation of swimmers in Great Britain, as he’ll host the inaugural AP Race London International meet next month.
In the lead-up to Paris, the main thing for Peaty is to enjoy himself, “because I don’t want to get to a place where I regret or hate where I’m at — or even worse.”
“The physical preparation goes on so my body will be ready to fight again when my heart and mind have caught up,” he said. “I’ll be ready when I need to be ready.
“What the future looks like, I don’t know, but I have a smile on my face at last. I’m courageous and resilient and will face the challenge that I need to face.”
Peaty, 28, is a five-time Olympic medalist, including a three-time Olympic gold medalist, all earned swimming breaststroke. He has set 14 World Records, individually or as part of relays, in his career. He currently holds the 16 fastest swims in history in the 100 long course meter breaststroke.
I’m not sure which is more insane – the fact that Adam feels the need to explain himself – or the comments judging him.
Adam, swim because you love it, not because you’re expected to. One day at a time, my friend!
Hope to see him in the finals in ‘24. Wish him the best
“Eiri and George, I’m sorry for letting you down.” I can only surmise they are part of the collateral damage for what is going on in his life. Well, not that it needed repeating, but ‘Project Immortal’ looks pretty sad right now. More than a touch of arrogance at the time of its proposal — and now, just another melancholy moment in his attempt to get back on top. I wish him well, but it seems as though some profound shifts in attitude will need to be forthcoming.
You’re right. It absolutely did not need repeating.
Rhetorical conventions in use. Read carefully.
In other Loughborough news, Lewis Burras is trialling with Mel Marshall and Ian Hulme in what looks like a move away from his Australian base with coach Zoe Baker.
It would make sense for Burras to train in the Uk, given convenient access to support services.
And the fact that his relay team mates are all here.
All?
As far as I know. Please enlighten me as to which potential members of the 4 x1 free aren’t UK based.
Relay practice is overrated. He should train wherever suits him but BS are controllung so they probably want him in Loughborough or Bath.
“..the breakdown of his relationship with the mother of his young son.”
The woman is the key of his story.
deers and their women stop downvoting
There’s been a blooming of trolls in the past few weeks.
He’s got a lot of time until Paris. So he can find a way to air out all the angst he’s feeling inside.
Disappointment is a very unpleasant feeling. But it happens to just about everyone who competes, especially in the sport of swimming.
All you can do is prepare the best you can and hope you can bring out your best performance on race day.
That’s all Adam can do as he goes for Paris 2024.
Peaty is always so real